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How to be More Successful

What drives successful women? Dr Jude Miller Burke grilled more than 100 lady millionaires for her book, The Millionaire Mystique. Here she reveals their route-to-rich tips. Take note… (and maybe open an extra bank account).


1. They Ditch The ‘OMG’ Language

Self-made millionaires avoid dramatic language—words such as ‘never’ or ‘always’ don’t feature in their vocabulary because, as leaders, they want people to feel calm and trust in their abilities. Using dramatic or emotionally-laden language causes anxiety in people around us, so they are less likely to have confidence in us. State the facts and position yourself as a calming influence.

2. They Check Their Bank Balance

Millionaires don’t ignore their finances—no matter what. They review budgets, logging expenses so they know exactly what’s in and out of their account each day. They see clearly what they can (and can’t) afford. All of the millionaires avoid ‘princess syndrome’ too—spending more than they can afford. They only splashed out on the big stuff after reaching financial security.

3. They Keep A Distance From Their Colleagues

While most of the women interviewed are friendly and keen to build relationships with colleagues, they all maintain a line between work friends and non-work friends. None of them get too close to colleagues; they’d never talk about marriage problems or friend dramas at work, for example. Instead, they manage their emotions (yes, that includes not crying at work). That’s what people respect—and what ultimately leads to promotions.

4. They Argue

Sixty per cent of the women interviewed described themselves as ‘argumentative’ and half said they are comfortable arguing a point to closure. Learning to be assertive is vital for achieving success, but it means ditching your hang-ups—worrying if you’ve upset somebody by speaking your mind is detrimental (that’s provided you remain polite and respectful, of course). Lose, “I don’t mind” from your vocabulary too— take a stance. You’ll waste less time.

5. They Are Schedule Freaks

Self-made millionaires have schedules and they stick to them. They know at the beginning of each week where they’ll be on which night, and with whom. Ensuring everything from meetings to free time is scheduled means you’re less likely to burn out, and you’ll work as efficiently as you possibly can.

6. They Avoid Negative People

The majority of women who became successful quickly cite incredibly supportive partners. Toxic relationships are rarely left at home; if you have a partner who criticises you regularly, or a best friend constantly causing drama, it will erode your self-esteem and impact your working life too. Surround yourself with people who support and really care about you.

7. They Have a ‘Dream Team’

Every single millionaire I’ve met has advisers—from financial experts to friends—whose opinions they trust. Remember, there’s no way you can know everything, so speak to people with experience in unfamiliar areas. Don’t be put off by cost—for example, an accountant doesn’t have to be hugely expensive if you pay hourly and visit them once or twice a year, but they can save you lots of money.

8. They Log Off Facebook

Each millionaire is so committed to getting the job done that they often turn up early to work and stay late, and are mindful of time-wasting, so they don’t take long lunches or use Facebook at their desk. How far can you expect to go if you’re busy snooping on your ex’s FB page?

9. They Get Physical

Each millionaire has a physical outlet to stay centred, ranging from team sports to meditation—all of which have been proven to reduce stress. No matter how busy they are, they do this regularly—some as often as twice a day.

10. They Take Breaks

All the millionaires see failure as part of their success; seventy per cent have had detours such as not getting the job they wanted or being made redundant. So be open to change. And if you do fail, please be compassionate towards yourself.


By Dr. Jude Miller Burke, Cosmopolitan, July 2015

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